Life with cancer - anger 2

There is more to anger and cancer than just the initial shock. There is the anger felt by the patient's family. This anger, in some ways, is harder to deal with than the "I've been cheated" anger because it's that and more.

After years of searching, I found the perfect woman for my wife. We married, bought a house, and began to start our life together. Both of us were in our 40's so we had a lot of time to "make up" in getting us to where we wanted to be. We were looking forward to a long and happy life together until, a mere three years into our marriage, my wife was diagnosed with Stage 4 breast cancer. It's cancer that has spread so far and fast that you are not expected to "recover" merely to "last as long as you can".

This changed our whole outlook. She remained positive and we determined to life our lives as well as we could. There are a variety of feelings going on there. As a husband, I was angry in the "how could this happen" manner. I also get angry from time to time at the situation that has been created. I'm angry at the fact that I'm going to lose my "life" partner way too early. I'm angry that my financial future is in grave jeopardy and I may not only lose my wife but even my house. I'm angry at the physical demands of caring for her as she slowly requires more help. Most of all, I'm angry at myself for being angry about any of this because it's nothing she can control.

Cancer is a very angry disease. It's more consuming than anyone can imagine until and unless you've been there. I hope you never have to find out.

Thoughts anyone?