Life with cancer - family and friends

Cancer has a profound effect on the relationship between the cancer patient and their family and friends. They experience the gamut of emotions from denial to those who feel the patient should get right into bed and wait to die as if lying still will help them live longer. My wife had even more to deal with since she decided from the outset that she was going to continue to work full-time as an assistant store manager of a large box retail chain.

She was a very independent and self-driven woman who was used to caring for those around her instead of having them care for her. It was very hard for her to accept help from others, especially when she was feeling good. What she had to learn (and it took a while) was that her family and friends NEEDED to help as much for themselves as for her. Since they couldn't cure her disease (which is what they really wanted to do), they needed to show how much they cared by doing other things. Running errands, dropping off food and other things like this were their way of saying "we love you and want you to get well".

Once she learned this, she had many wonderful times with a variety of friends and relatives. She would accept rides to stores, visits from friends, and other chances to spend time with people who just wanted to be there. It became a blessing for her and those around her. So while it was hard, in some ways this was a positive from the onset of cancer. To be clear, one of the few.

Thoughts anyone?